Yo, Please Pull Up Your Pants

        This is for all of the College of Charleston students who obviously do not have someone to  approve their outfits in the morning. Please pull up your pants. I don’t care to see the skateboards on your boxers today, and I certainly do not care to see your crack. I can not count how many times I have wanted to say something to boys rocking this look. It is time they know the truth. They look like idiots. The attire some of the young men on this campus choose to wear from day to day baffles me. Sideways hats, t-shirts with marijuana leaves on them, and pants “busting a sag” are not things I find attractive. 


I have so many questions for these young men who better deserve to be called boys. I want to know who taught them to dress this way. I think it is logical to assume that it probably was not their mothers. Better question yet, who funded these wardrobe options? I bet this was not their mothers either, but if they bought them on their own doesn’t that mean they must have had something better to wear to the interview? We can only hope. 


One would assume that you boys are on the College of Charleston campus because you go to school here, and that you are an intelligent human being who got this far and now is eager to receive a higher education. Do you plan on wearing these same outfits post graduation? If so, I don’t see a CEO position heading your way anytime soon. Do you hope to find a wife and start a family with her someday? This is another reason you might need to go shopping. I can guarantee you no employer or woman will see your baggy pants and think this guy is the one I’ve been looking for.


We go to college to mature and to find ourselves. If shirts with marijuana leaves on them are all you have found thus far, I recommend you keep looking. I am not demanding you dress up if shirt and tie everyday for class. I just ask that you present yourself in a way that is suitable for an intelligent College of Charleston student. Impress your professor and the ladies in class by throwing on a shirt without “I’m a pothead” written all over it, and you may find them beginning to respect you a little more. So I will ask you one more time -- please, pull up your pants.